Telling It The Way I See It

Well the new year is upon us now and I can’t tell you how glad I am. To say that 2011 was a bad year would be the understatement of the century!! So, fingers crossed, this year will be much better! Though I’ve probably just cursed myself saying that lol!!

Now, when it comes to new years resolutions, I’ve thought long and hard about this subject. I didn’t want to make one, that I knew, deep down, I would never actually keep. So, my resolution is to become a person that I actually like and want to be. How do I do this though??? I need to become a strong person, to know and understand myself. To be able to have the confidence in my own decisions and not let people make me feel bad for wanting to do what I want to. Its my life and no one else can run it for me and no one else has the right to make me feel bad for being happy. I will also be a lot more aware of people and their intentions. Whether it be friends or boyfriends, a lot of people are out there to hurt you and use you. Those are the sort of people I will be watching out for a lot more carefully, cause I refuse to let myself be used ever again by anyone. The main point I need to stick to though is to stay positive. If I continue to concentrate on the negativity around me, then I will be bogged down and continue the way I am now.Yes I will have days that things will still get to me, but I need to find the positive of the situation and if there is none, to just move on. If something’s not going right, I need to take a step back and reassess, pick myself up, dust of and try again! My aim is to grow as a person and without all of the above, none of this will happen.

So here’s to the New Year, I hope it brings you all you hope for, for a healthy, happy and prosperous new year to you all xx


This has to be one of my ‘All Time Great Sayings’. Mainly because it’s so true, but it can be taken in two ways…..well I think it can be anyway ๐Ÿ˜›

On the one hand, it can mean you have brilliant family, but should maybe be slightly more aware of the kind of company you keep.

On the other though, it can mean that ATLEAST you can pick your friends as the family you have, shall we say, leave a lot to be desired!

Mainly if I say it, it’s because someone in my family has really wound me up ( love you all really!! ) But no matter what happens they are still my family, and maybe more people should have a better tolerance with family members, because they’re the only ones you’re ever going to have!

Family is very important to me. I would do absolutely anything for my mum, dad, step parents, brother and sisters ( well most of them haha ). I can’t explain how I feel inside if someone upsets them. It’s like a massive rage boils up inside me to the point, that whoever has upset them, is better off staying out of my way or their head may end up somewhere the sun doesn’t shine lol. The worst thing is though, it doesn’t feel like a natural feeling. Not that you shouldn’t, I mean it actually scares me!! I remember speaking to my dad ages and ages ago ad he said he had been into a furniture store, a heated discussion started and as my dad was walking out, the Sales Assistant called him something very unpleasant. As soon as he told me this, my first thought was to go up to said furniture store and see how the guy liked having ‘not nice’ stuff said to him. Then it got to, if I go up there, heads will roll, then it moves on to the upset. Bet you’re all thinking I’m mad now. But seriously I ended up crying cause of it all and how bad it made me feel that someone had upset my family. Even when I was younger I was the same though. I can’t remember exactly what had happened but when I was in secondary school, I somehow found out that my sister had an argument or something, or someone had a go at her. Now she may be 3 years older than me, but I made a point to go up to this girl and tell her, never to speak to my sister like that ever again. I do remember swearing a lot, cause the older girl kept threatening to tell my mum that I had sworn, so I’m guessing I was proberly only about 12 at the time. Maybe I feel overly protective ย of them all, even my older brother whose 5 years older than me, I worry about him all the time. I like to check his girlfriends out, make sure they are ok for him haha.

All in all, I love my family to bits……..although there are times I could quite happily kill some of them haha. My older sister, Lyndsey and me have never quite seen eye to eye on pretty much everything. In fact if we weren’t related I know I’m not the sort of person she would pick as a friends and visa versa. We would argue like mad about anything pretty much, until normally one of us ended up in tears. Our Grandma always said to us, that as we grew up, we would become better friends and realise how important we are to each other and actually grow to ‘like’ each other. She may have had a slight point. Ok, we are certainly not best pals, but I think we have a better tolerance with each other now haha. We can last about 20 minutes in the room together now, as opposed to 10, before one of us is in tears lol, and I’m pretty sure Lyndsey doesn’t have to pretend one of us is dying in 24 hrs anymore just to be nice to me hahaha (hmmmmmm I will double-check though)

So where am I going with all this?? Ummmmmmm not 100% sure now haha (it is 4:15 AM though) Ah, ok, so really I’m wondering. If you could pick your family, would you?

I have my own ‘Famous Family’ (please someone else have one too or I will sound mad!!) My famous family, is pretty much what it says on the tin! It’s who my family would be if I could pick famous people. So my dad, would have to be Ray Liotta. I mean come on, how cool would he be to have as a dad. Know one would EVER mess with you!! Then Sarah Jessica Parker would be an awesome aunt and Tommy Lee Jones would be a fantastic Grandpa….so on and so on, you get the idea. This is just a little game I play with myself though. Then the more I think, would I swap the family I have, for my Famous Family???? Honestly, I don’t think I ever would! Don’t get me wrong, my family can be royal pains in the butt sometimes, but they are still MY family. All with our own little quirks, pet hates about each other. But as I said, that family will be the only true one you ever have, so make sure you do cherish those people. Cause once they’re gone, they can never be replaced. Friends will come and go, but your family is always there. No matter how far away you go, your family is always the same crazy, lovable, annoyingly stubborn, funny bunch of people you’ll ever be able to call yours!!

My Crazy Bunch, when I was aged One:

{July 24, 2011}   Race For Life 2011

Well today was the day……. Portsmouth’ Race For Life 2011. A woman only walk to raise money for Cancer Research UK, a charity very close to my heart!

It’s the 4th year I’ve done it but it means so much to me today as it did in2008!! The last 2 years even more though, since I lost my beloved Grandad to cancer ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

The weather was perfect for it, nice and sunny but with a lovely cool breeze and it took place along the seafront, the perfect venue in my eyes. There were thousands upon thousands of woman there, so dressed up in fancy dress, so there to walk, some there to run. Woman and girls of all ages. It was great to see everyone getting together for such a brilliant event!

The whole way round was quite hard for me, and the pain kicked in very early on, but there was noway i was going to give in. If I had a slight waver, i’d just picture grandad in my head, or look down at his name on my arm and it gave me that incentive to push harder! In the end, it took me and my mum 45mins to do 5km, which I was very happy with!!!

A massive well done to everyone who took part, and a massive thank you to anyone who sponsored someone. And lastly, a massive thought to those who we have lost through cancer, to those who continue to fight it, and for those who have thankfully beaten it!! Those people will forever be in my prayers!!

I am still reeling from a comment made by a ‘so called friend’.

I wont embaress them by putting a name by the comment made was…….

***** ******* is just wondering what my friends on facebook think about an MP campagining for one individual to have IVF before she should be entitled to it?? What makes this person so special that she gets prefiential treatment when there are hundreds of other couples and individuals that are all in the same boat and do not fit the criteria but no one campaigns for them!!! Answers below.

Now for those who read my blog you will know about my meeting with my local MP. The fact that I met her to talk about setting up a infertility support group and NOT for my own benefit, seems to be lost on this person. The part regarding her helping me was just a bonus. Now, say you go for a really expensive meal that you cant really afford but that you do everything to save up for it, then are told that there maybe a way to get it free, would you turn it down??? I think not!!!!!!

The way I have been made out is that I am looking after No 1, which I must state is NOT the case at all!!

I have been making scarfs, quilts, blankets and doing peoples nails to save up for my IVF, doing anything i can think of just to raise the money. All the time this other person sits on her bum, waiting for everything to come to her. That’s not a dig by any means, its just a fact. Nothing in life comes for free, so if you really want something…..GET OUT THERE AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!

The other thing that has annoyed me about the whole comment, is that ANYONE can appeal to their local PCT to receive IVF funding. Any tom, dick or harry. But it does involve doing something yourself.

This is what I have done. Above anything, the most important thing to me is to get the support group up and running, anything else would be an added bonus.

So anyone thinking I am doing this for my own benefit is very wrong. I just can’t help it that someone wants to help me, because i have taken the time and effort to research and do something about getting what I want. If that makes me selfish, then selfish I must be!

Everyone else I no has been so supportive and have wished me the best, offered help with anything I need……but there’s always someone who wants to knock you down, that person normally turns out to be the jealous one. Someone should tell them, Green really doesn’t suit them ๐Ÿ˜‰

et cetera